Me (to He):
Ms. Floyd has expressed an interest in the three of us “hanging out” as it were.

Perhaps you could consult your assistant and determine a time where we might take lunch and imbibe of the beer.

Another alternative would be to descend one flight of stairs and join up for cocktails.

Please advise.

He (to We):
Yes, would love to.

This month I am committed to a early morning yoga class everyday but Friday. Thus Thursday is my only night during the week when I can stay up late like an adult. So how about next Thusday evening? Cocktails at the Fordham?

She (to We):
Cocktails at the Fordham next Thursday sound lovely. we can all review for my stats test together!

Me (to She):
Um. No.

She (to Me):
What’s the fun of drinking if there isn’t any math involved? That’s the best part!

Me (to She):

There are only two types of math that are appropriate when drinking.

1. Ratios: e.g. 1 part Dry Vermouth to 3 parts Gin
2. “Imaginary” or “Irrational” numbers: e.g. “I’ve only had (counting on fingers) one — two — three — four — a couple of drinks…”

All other maths are null and void at the time the liquor hits the glass.

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