Watching Law & Order with my wife this morning and I don’t understand why these brilliant detectives can’t understand how the computerons work, or why they can’t just ask somebody ‘hey can we find out who wrote this blog?’.
INT. POLICE DEPARTMENT – EARLY EVENING – ESTABLISHING
Two detectives concentrating on a computer monitor. Desktop is strewn with empty coffee cups, snack wrappers, the detritus of a hard day’s work.
DETECTIVE FRANK
(glaring)
So he blogged all his crimes?
DETECTIVE BILL
He did. But he covered his tracks. Pseudonym, fake email address…
DETECTIVE FRANK
(quoting)
“thedevil@theback.door”
DETECTIVE BILL
(continuing)
…profile information is all song lyrics.
We’ll have to read every one of these blog entries to find clues to his whereabouts…
EXT. POLICE DEPARTMENT BUILDING EXTERIOR – EARLY MORNING – ESTABLISHING
INT. POLICE DEPARTMENT
Bleary eyed detective Frank is still reading blog posts. Bill walks in.
DETECTIVE BILL
Still here Frank?
DETECTIVE FRANK
I think I’m on to something Bill, there’s a few entries on his blog which mention the L train and this bagel shop…
DETECTIVE BILL
Bill, we pulled that guy in last night. When you mentioned his blog, I emailed the hosting provider and asked for an IP address. Told them I could get a warrant, but they just volunteered. Turns out all the previous logins were from the same IP, routed back to the local cable internet service provider. So I called them up and got physical address and the boys picked him up before dinner. He’s in lock-up now.
What have you been doing all this time?
DETECTIVE FRANK
Uh. Creating a GUI interface in Visual Basic?
First off, I like the desk description. My desk is not a mess it is just “strewn with the detritus of a hard day’s work”, so I am a hard worker, not a slob.
Maybe the VB mention was a joke. Think about it, one guy sits up all night and ends up looking like a fool later for his wasted efforts, and he says he was using VB. Perhaps his stupidity and waste of time on the blog is meant to be a metaphor for using VB.
:)
There was actually a scene in an episode of CSI: NY where one of the intrepid investigators actually used the phrase “I’ll create a GUI using Visual Basic…see if I can track an IP address”